Dating tips for introverted women


28-Sep-2020 04:44

There’s a problem with the one-size-fits-all wisdom commonly intoned during dating discussions (“Just put yourself out there! After jumping through the hoops of answering questions such as “where are you from? ” one too many times, you start feeling that dates are no longer probable sources of a deep, meaningful relationship, but rather deep, dark pits of despair. You tend to be sucked of all your energy as if you’ve been set upon by a Harry Potter dementor. Don’t feel the need to go into some long, drawn-out explanation either.

Because, as introverts, we often derive our energy from solitude and quiet contemplation in which to process life’s events, we have only so much social goodwill to go around. Just simply state that you need to reschedule, and offer an alternative date, time, and place. I’m going to pass along the best piece of advice my old therapist ever gave me.

[Read: Why giving space to each other will actually bring you closer] #2 Accept their frequent activities with friends.In the little section where you’re asked, “How do you typically spend a Friday night? I say I’m usually at a yoga class, winding down after the week.” (you know the one—it’s where most people say, “Sometimes I like to go out, but then sometimes I like to stay in,” and you want to reply, “O RLLY? There’s a good chance that you’ll discover the subtle difference between the “just put yourself out there!” attitude and the kind of effort that aligns itself with your intuition and all of your wonderfully weird qualities. Tune out that well-intentioned advice, and keep what you want at the forefront of your mind.

The goal here is not snagging a partnership that looks like a carbon copy of every rom-com.

An extrovert who stays home in silence too long usually begins to get depressed, and being in a relationship with someone who’s constantly glum won’t be much fun for you, anyway.



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