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The pressure of feeling like I literally had his life in my hands was too much for me to handle at the age of 19.I felt more helpless each time I attempted to break up.It got to the point that I felt I could no longer figure out what I did to set him off, I just knew that when he reached a certain point of anger there was nothing I could do to stop it.I just had to keep my head down and wait for it to be over.He would call me saying he was standing on the edge of a cliff ready to jump if I did not get back together with him.I would drive to the cliff and beg him to get away from the edge.We never discussed it beyond the general basics most children learn, no one is allowed to physically harm you, make sure you tell us if you are being bullied, and never bully or physically hurt anyone else.Abuse in relationships was not a topic of conversation because it did not need to be.
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When I would try he would threaten the safety of me and my family, or threaten to commit suicide.His friends were over which was even more disrespectful and insulting to him so he locked me in his room for 4 hours to teach me a lesson. One day at high school we received individual research projects for my Community and Family Studies class. As I was reading through all of the photocopied research I had collected, I started to cry uncontrollably.
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